Who is Tony Torezzi anyhow?
My name is Tony. It’s actually short for Anatol. Blame my mother, she’s half-Polish. My father is Italian-American. Curiously, my brother is Swedish. As a child I always wanted to be older. Now I am. This has given me the belief that my dreams will always come true, and given me a confidence that both intimidates and irritates. I was always the funny one at school. I had to be in order to survive. It was a tough environment. My best buddy Isaac Ristov died in math class. To this day I never use a calculator.
My father ran a farm fresh chicken shack with a Chinese twist called Cock-A-Noodle-Do. Or at least he did until the health department shut it down. It broke his spirit. Poor old pop never recovered and I have never respected authority since*. My ma was in the merchant marines. She shot a seal in Alaska once. Tough lady. But I think it was my aunt Gloria who really inspired me to go for comedy in my life. ‘You ain’t great looking Anatol’, she would say to me ‘and you’ll be bald by the time you’re twenty-five so I suggest you take up comedy.’ I thought she was crazy and told her so. But after collecting the 2011 Vancouver Crazy Elk award for best callback in a festival circuit two-prov Harold, I guess she’s the one with the last laugh, eh Gloria?
*Please note I have the utmost respect for authority as far as the legal system and my lawyers are concerned regarding the Kleinmann v Torezzi sexual harassment claim, 2007.